Still Recovering

You know, I thought that maybe since I was in such good shape I would recover sooner than I had heard people do. My chemo fatigue was never too bad -- but it's still with me. What I hear is that it lasts for as long as you have had chemo, again. So, gee, I don't know, it could last through this coming winter I guess. Hopefully it will abate by the fall, though -- I get tired in the winter anyway. (I think it's seasonal.)

My fatigue is not bad -- because I have always had great energy -- but I don't have my usual energy now. I'm still biking 2-3 times a week (a total of 70-90 miles), but can't build up to doing a 50 mile ride comfortably, though I have been biking this amount since before chemo without more than a week and a half off at a time (one for the mastectomy and one for ice.) I rode 49 miles yesterday, and that was the first time since early on in my chemo that I'd ridden close to 50 miles (about a year ago) and it was hard! (My butt hurt. I'm borrowing these new saddles from JOan to try out on my bike, & will buy one from her if it works. They're really hard, so I'm skeptical, but they're leather, and I've met a number of people who swear by them -- they say that these saddles get dents and dimples exactly where your butt bones are and they fit perfectly after that. (Could that work? I have so little butt padding that I use a pillow on my seat at the dining room table.... could it be that if it were fitted to MY butt it would work just as well?)

Just so you know what I mean about still having chemo fatigue despite all this biking -- two summers ago I built up to longer and longer bike rides, so that in addition to the usual rides that summer I did a 60 mile ride, an 80, and finally a century. I remember clearly that the main obstacles to doing those long rides had to do with leaving the kids home alone for long periods of time, particularly Em, since she's younger. I did the century while both kids were out of town with Kathy and Ted. (My butt hurt after the century.... I remember that too!)

Anyhow, back to the present -- today I went swimming. I've been tired swimming too, and today I enjoyed it more than I have been, which is a success. (I drag myself through the mile if I'm too tired to enjoy it -- no quitting!) My arm and scar stopped hurting after 13 lengths -- a 5th of a mile. I was warned about the tightness -- it's post radiation shrinkage trying to restrict my motion. It will fail. I think I can conquer it swimming, without the need for PT, though if I need PT I will do that. I'd prefer to avoid it though because aside from the fact that I just spent over $2000 on my mouth, I'm maxing out on medical appointments. I mean even for interpreting jobs I have asked if I can have school meetings instead for awhile. I prefer them anyway, but there aren't as many to be had as medical appointments.

It's hard for me to judge where I'm at in the recovery process because I'm living with myself all the time, but I asked Joan and Rosa what they thought during a break in yesterday's bike ride. (Only Joan and Rosa and Alice and I rode the whole ride, and Alice didn't know me before chemo.) Both Joan and Rosa agreed that I was faster and stronger before, & that I am still recovering. I thought so, but I'm comparing myself to them, and they are not static either..... Rosa is training for the senior olympics! In fact, the only reason why I was able to mostly keep up with her yesterday was that her trainer had scheduled her for an easy week last week. :-D (I did mention that she's 72 or 3, right? My role model.....)