Balancing Act

Went on a hard hill ride yesterday. Lynn led it. Lynn's always been out of my league; I could not keep up with her before chemo -- but she was testing out a new route and invited me and Joan to come with her -- because we hadn't been able to ride with her last Friday I think. It felt like an honor, somehow, so I really wanted to say yes. I like Lynn -- though I mostly know her through Joan and email contact, since I can't keep up with her for long enough to get to know her well while biking. (Now there's a motivator!)

So I arranged to ride Tuesday instead of Wednesday, & made sure Em would have people to hang with on Tuesday. Lynn rearranged her work schedule to do this at 9:30 for us instead of early early, as she usually does. And..... well..... honestly, it ended up being 50 miles of rolling hills in the blistering heat. Joan and Lynn waited for me at turns, because I fell behind on the hills. I got worried pretty early on, because I was tired by mile 5. HOwever -- though I had a hard time going up every hill, and my butt hurt, it wasn't harder going up the hills towards the end of the ride the way it was in Marshall -- it was just the same hard. And on the way home Joan and I stopped at SPokes and I got a seat cover - and it felt SO GOOD not to have pain every time I pushed down on the pedals that I sped up, and did better on the one last hill! SO, apparently the problem is not all in my lungs at the moment, but in my butt as well.

The background to that is, I've been trying a new saddle. My last one chafed on the sides. This one definitely is a better fit -- however, it's HARD. People swear by this kind of saddle, a brooks leather saddle. So I am giving it a try. However, it is possible that it won't work for me. I have a really flat butt, really very little padding on the bones. I mean, I use a sofa cushion on my seat at the dining room table..... know what I'm saying????

ANyway -- yesterday's ride was hard enough that I didn't even have it to walk the dog or swim today. I did walk her to the library and back, ~2 flat miles -- but I owed her 4. I meant to do it tonight, and it is nicer walking late at night than in the hothothot day -- but gawd, look at the time (I don't know what time zone this thing is in -- it's 1:10am MY time.) Tomorrow. I probably would have made it to do more if I hadn't gone rowing tonight -- but I had to leave for my rowing class by 5:30, and I had trouble getting going today. (Rowing is good, and I learn a lot, and it strengthens some of my muscles -- or would if I did it more than once a week, I think -- but it's never hard or fast enough to be a cardiovascular workout.) Rowing was one reason why I thought biking yesterday would work better than today -- my butt has been hurting on the boat after having spent the morning hours on a hard bike seat. It was better today.... however, the trail ride that happened today, which I missed, sounded a lot more appropriate for me. I'm up to speed on the trail rides, ahead of most, sometimes, so no one has to wait for me -- AND I don't have to get left behind. (The ride I wrote about in the last post was an exception; I've done fine since then. It was they who were fast, I do think, now, not I who was slow.)

Also, I did all right last week just walking and swimming, mostly, and biking only once. Marc and EMily were here and I wanted to spend time with them as much as possible -- and it worked. I'm hoping that bodes well for the New Mexico trip...... but we will see. I tried to get Bruce to help me figure out a workout plan, but he didn't really get it..... or maybe I have to ask him a bit further. Thing is, I get the feeling he thinks I'm just worrying, so he reassures me. But I'm worrying only because I don't have a plan, and reassurance isn't helping me because it's a plan that I need. He said I could get up at 5am and borrow a mountain bike and do 20 miles. I suppose.... maybe I could do that once if I got truly desperate. But I'm really not a morning person (I mean I'm REALLY not a morning person!) And I'm still tired from chemo -- mornings are hard. And the hot flashes that wake me in the night mean I probably take more time in bed to get a night's sleep than I used to...... and without a workout they are more frequent......

I would be happy to walk for an hour in the evenings, if there's someone who'd be interested in coming with me who walks nice and fast -- I'm not really going to be comfortable going for a walk on my own in the dark in an unfamiliar place with no dog! And I'll bring my swimsuit & hope for a pool..... He said not to rent a car, but maybe we should. I'm happy to borrow a bike to get myself to a pool or whatever, but distances are further out there I hear.

OKay I'm going to shut up now. Maybe this is a dumb blog post. Well I guess you don't have to read it.....