It's freezing here. It would have been nice if I could have just followed my doctor's plan and been done with chemo -- the timing was such that I would have had a little fur cover for winter, and been starting radiation now, which is a nice topical burning, just right for when it's freezing outside.
I mean if you have to do it, isn't winter the time? You know? But no, I have to be stubborn and have more chemo. I still stand by my reasons -- most of the time -- I hope. But the timing was better the other way. I mean, I can't really complain about hitting winter when I'm going into my 3rd course of chemo, given that each course is 3 months long and I had to stop for surgery after the 2nd, & take a break before and after it of a month each. I did in fact do chemo for my three favorite seasons since the start of my breast cancer treatment -- but they're over now.... just because when you're not in PR, seasons happen!
I do worry that this part will be the hardest just because it's winter. I always have a hard time with winter, so why should this one be different? It is better since we moved (3 month winters here, as opposed to 5.5 month winters in BOston. They were so long there, I used to feel like a mole blinking in the sunlight after they ended. Here they actually end soon enough that I still remember who I am afterwards -- whew!)
ANyway -- my hair is falling out again. It wasn't keeping me very warm anyway -- it's only an inch or two long, and the first inch is thin and white. It's nice that most of it started coming in thicker and brown after the chemo hair. (I had hair while I was on weekly taxol, but it was white and soft, like a baby duck. Not quiiite real hair. I did worry about the white, but I think most of it was just temporary actually. I did have some real white hair before, and it was thick and wiry, not wispy and flyaway.) Anyway this is not a big deal -- except that I have to get my friend to come shave me again before I get hair all over -- or worse, under -- everything. (Will have to start wearing hats when I dress, so I don't get hair under my shirt and itch all day like after a new haircut.)
What's more of a problem for me is that I have been having GI problems for the last week. It just occurred to me that it could be the chemo. I will ask. I haven't had that before, from chemo -- however I have also not had GI problems before chemo that remained unresolved after a day or two of low eating and bland food diet. It's not a tummy ache; I don't get those. It's gas and bloating, very gross and uncomfortable. They said the chemo could cause diarrhea or constipation, but this is neither. Feels like my gut would prefer if I didn't eat much of anything really -- which wouldn't be the best idea, nutritionally, if it has to go on for months.... I will have to check in with them about it.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Friday, December 5, 2008
Oops
I lost track of time this afternoon and didn't call the cardiologist's office until it was closed..... I actually managed to get distracted despite a couple of reminders in the interim! If I'd been able to call in the morning it would have been fine; I usually do a good job getting important stuff done when I can get it done first. THing is, the doctor wanted me to call late in the day..... and I guess that's a time when lots of things happen around here and I'm busy doing mom stuff and my own stuff gets left til later.
So anyway I won't find out til MOnday. I wasn't planning to do any heavy exercise over the weekend anyway, I don't think...... but I'm disappointed to have to wait that long for such a dumb reason. I considered leaving a message for the on-call doctor...... but the outgoing message said clearly that any non emergency calls would not be answered.
So anyway I won't find out til MOnday. I wasn't planning to do any heavy exercise over the weekend anyway, I don't think...... but I'm disappointed to have to wait that long for such a dumb reason. I considered leaving a message for the on-call doctor...... but the outgoing message said clearly that any non emergency calls would not be answered.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Great Cardiologist! and a knee comment
The cardiologist was great. He did an EKG and had some blood drawn for things I don't usually have checked (like potassium and magnesium) and had me schedule an echocardiogram. (That's on Thursday.) The EKG was normal, and he said to call the day after the echo, and go easy on the biking til we have the results, though he thinks they will probably be okay. (He said not to worry about anything else I do.) He explained a lot of stuff. I will try to have questions ready for Friday -- since he seemed great about answering them all.
He didn't seem to mind that I had biked there..... (I didn't tell him it wa 13 miles each way, but he HAS my address.) I think the main thing was, I have been biking wearing a heart rate monitor and making sure my HR stays within range -- in my case my max is 180, so try to keep it under like 175, and usually under 170. I did tell him that. Today it was easier than yesterday -- I think my HR is better, though it could be that I was riding slower because my R knee is hurting. (Don't think so, though, given the time -- and my resting HR is a little better too.) I think he was cool about the biking because he has a biking past -- in fact he said he and my oncologist met 20 years ago as biking buddies! (Now why does that make me feel like I'm in good hands? But it does!)
I don't mind missing tomorrow's ride, though it is out to the bread store in Herndon..... but actually my right knee has been talking to me. Given the 26 miles I rode today and the 26 I rode yesterday (and the 26 I am probably going to be riding again on thursday -- to get the echocardiogram!) I think my knee would like to go to the chiropractor tomorrow and go swimming.
On knees -- I don't know if I mentioned this, but my Mayo oncologist explained that I have two separate benign conditions in my two separate knees. I had asked him to order an MRI on my right knee, as something had been seen on it on an Xray of my hip @ g-town -- but I had mentioned the irony that it's my left knee that usually gives me enough trouble to go to the chiropractor .... so he ordered a scan of them both. At the time I didn't appreciate it, because I was hoping to see the pathology from my removed breast, but now that I've seen it and am dealing with it and my KNEE hurts, I think it's really neat that he took the time to explain it and show me pictures of it. (I think it's SO COOL when doctors do wonderful things like that. I have had a lot of luck lately with that kind of thing, haven't I???)
Now if I were really together I'd find that knee report and bring it to the chiropractor. WOuldn't that be smart? I'll write myself a note..... too tired now. Now what I need to do is walk the dog and make dinner -- but what I really WANT to do is have a hot bath. :-D
He didn't seem to mind that I had biked there..... (I didn't tell him it wa 13 miles each way, but he HAS my address.) I think the main thing was, I have been biking wearing a heart rate monitor and making sure my HR stays within range -- in my case my max is 180, so try to keep it under like 175, and usually under 170. I did tell him that. Today it was easier than yesterday -- I think my HR is better, though it could be that I was riding slower because my R knee is hurting. (Don't think so, though, given the time -- and my resting HR is a little better too.) I think he was cool about the biking because he has a biking past -- in fact he said he and my oncologist met 20 years ago as biking buddies! (Now why does that make me feel like I'm in good hands? But it does!)
I don't mind missing tomorrow's ride, though it is out to the bread store in Herndon..... but actually my right knee has been talking to me. Given the 26 miles I rode today and the 26 I rode yesterday (and the 26 I am probably going to be riding again on thursday -- to get the echocardiogram!) I think my knee would like to go to the chiropractor tomorrow and go swimming.
On knees -- I don't know if I mentioned this, but my Mayo oncologist explained that I have two separate benign conditions in my two separate knees. I had asked him to order an MRI on my right knee, as something had been seen on it on an Xray of my hip @ g-town -- but I had mentioned the irony that it's my left knee that usually gives me enough trouble to go to the chiropractor .... so he ordered a scan of them both. At the time I didn't appreciate it, because I was hoping to see the pathology from my removed breast, but now that I've seen it and am dealing with it and my KNEE hurts, I think it's really neat that he took the time to explain it and show me pictures of it. (I think it's SO COOL when doctors do wonderful things like that. I have had a lot of luck lately with that kind of thing, haven't I???)
Now if I were really together I'd find that knee report and bring it to the chiropractor. WOuldn't that be smart? I'll write myself a note..... too tired now. Now what I need to do is walk the dog and make dinner -- but what I really WANT to do is have a hot bath. :-D
Monday, December 1, 2008
Cardiologist Visit tomorrow
So tomorrow I go to see this cardiologist and hope he knows what kind of test to do (echo-cardiogram? EKG? MUGA scan? All of the above?) At least I have a problem I know needs addressed, NOW, thanks to Joan, who brought me her husband's heart rate monitor yesterday and then today loaned me her blood pressure cuff -- despite the fact that the pulsing I got on Thanksgiving day has not recurred.
My BP looks okay, low normal as usual. HOwever, my heart rate is abnormal. It's never been as low as you would think for someone who does as much regular physical activity as I do...... and I guess it did go up 5-10 beats/min during my first 6 months of chemo. However, it's now 20 beats/min above normal. I'm talking I'm getting resting pulses around 100.
I had an eye appointment today and I biked to it wearing this heart rate monitor, being careful not to let my HR go above 170-175, which is a good upper limit for me during vigorous exercise. Except today I got up to it without a whole lot of vigor...... Biking up small hills would get me above 160, which is nuts. I'm really glad I had the monitor, because without it it would really not have been intuitive to ride that slowly. Joan came with me (because she's just that way.) I asked her what our pace was a couple of times, so I know I was getting heart rates in the 160s at 10-11 mph.
I was on my old mountain bike -- and once we were going slightly uphill on the CCT -- and the other time going slightly downhill, but with a headwind. Still I'm not sure I could keep up with the Babes at the pace I would need to ride to keep my HR in a safe range, even on the Pilot (my nice road bike.)
So.... while I have had no recurrence of the Thanksgiving pulsing, I have something to bring to the cardiologist. I need to know what is going on with me and have it addressed -- by medicine, stopping the chemo, whatever. (Of course so far I'm hearing denial that the chemo or steroids could have caused this -- but something did, and it happened a week after I had them, so it seems kinda like a logical connection to look for, you know?)
I sure hope this guy knows what to do, and that something can be done that works. At this point I'm not sure how much I can ride my bike, though the monitor is a godsend (maybe I should make up a new word -- "joansend"?) and I'm afraid to swim (even though I can!) because I can't wear the heart rate monitor in the water ..... and of course I don't dare have sex......
Aren't I maybe a wee bit young and healthy for this kinda thing? Yeah I know I have breast cancer, and it was caught kinda late -- but even with that and this heart rate stuff, I still feel healthy -- particularly healthy, healthier than most, as usual. The only thing that bothered me today really was my right knee, on the ride back from Chevy Chase. My knees apparently each have separate benign conditions, my Mayo oncologist told me after the MRI of them. Nice to know, you know? Maybe if I can't ride on Wednesday I'll pay a visit to my favorite chiropractor and have it, um, fixed (I don't think I've seen him since before my mastectomy.) Then if I'm cleared to, maybe I can go swimming.....
My BP looks okay, low normal as usual. HOwever, my heart rate is abnormal. It's never been as low as you would think for someone who does as much regular physical activity as I do...... and I guess it did go up 5-10 beats/min during my first 6 months of chemo. However, it's now 20 beats/min above normal. I'm talking I'm getting resting pulses around 100.
I had an eye appointment today and I biked to it wearing this heart rate monitor, being careful not to let my HR go above 170-175, which is a good upper limit for me during vigorous exercise. Except today I got up to it without a whole lot of vigor...... Biking up small hills would get me above 160, which is nuts. I'm really glad I had the monitor, because without it it would really not have been intuitive to ride that slowly. Joan came with me (because she's just that way.) I asked her what our pace was a couple of times, so I know I was getting heart rates in the 160s at 10-11 mph.
I was on my old mountain bike -- and once we were going slightly uphill on the CCT -- and the other time going slightly downhill, but with a headwind. Still I'm not sure I could keep up with the Babes at the pace I would need to ride to keep my HR in a safe range, even on the Pilot (my nice road bike.)
So.... while I have had no recurrence of the Thanksgiving pulsing, I have something to bring to the cardiologist. I need to know what is going on with me and have it addressed -- by medicine, stopping the chemo, whatever. (Of course so far I'm hearing denial that the chemo or steroids could have caused this -- but something did, and it happened a week after I had them, so it seems kinda like a logical connection to look for, you know?)
I sure hope this guy knows what to do, and that something can be done that works. At this point I'm not sure how much I can ride my bike, though the monitor is a godsend (maybe I should make up a new word -- "joansend"?) and I'm afraid to swim (even though I can!) because I can't wear the heart rate monitor in the water ..... and of course I don't dare have sex......
Aren't I maybe a wee bit young and healthy for this kinda thing? Yeah I know I have breast cancer, and it was caught kinda late -- but even with that and this heart rate stuff, I still feel healthy -- particularly healthy, healthier than most, as usual. The only thing that bothered me today really was my right knee, on the ride back from Chevy Chase. My knees apparently each have separate benign conditions, my Mayo oncologist told me after the MRI of them. Nice to know, you know? Maybe if I can't ride on Wednesday I'll pay a visit to my favorite chiropractor and have it, um, fixed (I don't think I've seen him since before my mastectomy.) Then if I'm cleared to, maybe I can go swimming.....
Friday, November 28, 2008
Chest Throb @ T-giving
I got this weird symptom yesterday -- it started around the time we were eating dinner I think. My chest throbbed -- on both sides, like a band across my chest -- I would say about three big beats, every time I got up, once when I sat on the toilet, and once when I drank a glass of water! Before I went to sleep when it had still not resolved, I called the oncologist on call at my onc's practice, and he had no idea what it could be. The chemo combo I'm on now isn't known to have any cardiovascular side effects, he denied it could be the 4 days of steroids I was on last week (hmmmmm...... ) and thought it might possibly be a late side effect of the adriamycin I took over the summer.
He said not to do any biking or running over the weekend, and to try to get an echocardiogram on Monday. He said that perhaps the cardiologist would try to induce the throb.
I know it's thanksgiving weekend, but I'm pretty sure there will be no sign of this by MOnday (I've barely felt any trace of it today.) I'm worried that nothing will be found out, and I will not know how careful I have to be about exercise for the next few months, and will worry about the next chemo infusion..... and even if this has something to do with the adriamycin I took over the summer how can the steroids not be part of it......? I mean I took them for 4 days -- and barely slept for 5 nights because of them!
Anyway....... I'm bummed because I have an eye appointment on Monday I want to go to -- by bike of course. I will have to change it to Tuesday or Thursday (but not later because I need to see what all those steroids did to my eyes!) I hope this is nothing serious and that they can know that....... I did walk the dog today (a little slower at first, and 3 miles rather than 4) and had no symptoms at all. I've been walking every day for the last few (usually 4 miles w/dog) but nothing more. I had planned to swim one day this weekend, but maybe I will wait now til this is resolved ........ or something!
On the bright side I did feel better today.......... I've been sleeping a lot, and have been having these wonderful meals cooked by my husband. (This is not because of the cancer, either -- he always makes thanksgiving dinner. Am I lucky or what? He cooks every weekend, too, but not like he does at Thanksgiving.) In fact this year he made me this sugar free sweet potato pie to die for. I'm hoping no one else likes it...... I've eaten about half of it, and so far so good! :-) They've finished their pumpkin pie though.......
Yesterday we had a great thanksgiving at home. We had my mom & a wonderful guest I could not believe drove 3 hours each way to spend Thanksgiving with us in the middle of preparing to defend her PhD dissertation ...... I knew her when we were kids, and every time I've seen her since we've been grownups I am blown away....... She's gone of course-- stayed less than 24 hours -- but she was here, really, I didn't make it up!
Anyway if anyone knows anything about chest throbs after or during chemo or anything I'm listening. It was a bit disconcerting to find the onc on call so clueless about it. I was so hoping he'd say "Oh yeah that! It's because of the whatsis -- should be gone in a day or two. Yeah have an echocardiogram to make sure but don't worry." Oh well. At least I should have no trouble getting the echo.
He said not to do any biking or running over the weekend, and to try to get an echocardiogram on Monday. He said that perhaps the cardiologist would try to induce the throb.
I know it's thanksgiving weekend, but I'm pretty sure there will be no sign of this by MOnday (I've barely felt any trace of it today.) I'm worried that nothing will be found out, and I will not know how careful I have to be about exercise for the next few months, and will worry about the next chemo infusion..... and even if this has something to do with the adriamycin I took over the summer how can the steroids not be part of it......? I mean I took them for 4 days -- and barely slept for 5 nights because of them!
Anyway....... I'm bummed because I have an eye appointment on Monday I want to go to -- by bike of course. I will have to change it to Tuesday or Thursday (but not later because I need to see what all those steroids did to my eyes!) I hope this is nothing serious and that they can know that....... I did walk the dog today (a little slower at first, and 3 miles rather than 4) and had no symptoms at all. I've been walking every day for the last few (usually 4 miles w/dog) but nothing more. I had planned to swim one day this weekend, but maybe I will wait now til this is resolved ........ or something!
On the bright side I did feel better today.......... I've been sleeping a lot, and have been having these wonderful meals cooked by my husband. (This is not because of the cancer, either -- he always makes thanksgiving dinner. Am I lucky or what? He cooks every weekend, too, but not like he does at Thanksgiving.) In fact this year he made me this sugar free sweet potato pie to die for. I'm hoping no one else likes it...... I've eaten about half of it, and so far so good! :-) They've finished their pumpkin pie though.......
Yesterday we had a great thanksgiving at home. We had my mom & a wonderful guest I could not believe drove 3 hours each way to spend Thanksgiving with us in the middle of preparing to defend her PhD dissertation ...... I knew her when we were kids, and every time I've seen her since we've been grownups I am blown away....... She's gone of course-- stayed less than 24 hours -- but she was here, really, I didn't make it up!
Anyway if anyone knows anything about chest throbs after or during chemo or anything I'm listening. It was a bit disconcerting to find the onc on call so clueless about it. I was so hoping he'd say "Oh yeah that! It's because of the whatsis -- should be gone in a day or two. Yeah have an echocardiogram to make sure but don't worry." Oh well. At least I should have no trouble getting the echo.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
nauseous
So after the steroid buzz wore off I was surprised to wake up on Monday morning with chemo nausea --talk about a delayed reaction! I did forget to push fluids -- next time I will have to remember to drink 2-3 liters a day. I did fine with this over the summer (I ate a watermelon every 2-3 days when water started tasting bad) but it's not so instinctive to push fluids when it's cold out -- and I think the nurse didn't worry about going through all the symptoms with me because I've been through chemo before, and really just a little while ago. (Too bad about my short attention span....)
I think pushing fluids will make a difference -- but I am also considering switching my chemo day from Thursday to Tuesday. Because I need to be on steroids for so many days I was wakeful and energetic and sleepless Wednesday through Sunday, and wiped out on Monday, and still tired today. The sleeplessness might work better Monday through Friday, when the alarm goes off at 6am, with the weekend to rest.....
Anyway that's a thought. And now I'm going to grab a nap and hope I get get out to walk and/ or swim later this morning. It's nice out -- pretty good biking weather! (low 40s) Two days in a row I'm missing it....... and these were the days I had this week; kids are off tomorrow and thanksgiving stuff starts....... On the other hand it looks like it will stay in the 40s through the weekend, so, hmm, we'll see what I can fit in!
I think pushing fluids will make a difference -- but I am also considering switching my chemo day from Thursday to Tuesday. Because I need to be on steroids for so many days I was wakeful and energetic and sleepless Wednesday through Sunday, and wiped out on Monday, and still tired today. The sleeplessness might work better Monday through Friday, when the alarm goes off at 6am, with the weekend to rest.....
Anyway that's a thought. And now I'm going to grab a nap and hope I get get out to walk and/ or swim later this morning. It's nice out -- pretty good biking weather! (low 40s) Two days in a row I'm missing it....... and these were the days I had this week; kids are off tomorrow and thanksgiving stuff starts....... On the other hand it looks like it will stay in the 40s through the weekend, so, hmm, we'll see what I can fit in!
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Steroid Buzz
I had to take steroids Wednesday through Saturday, and it was too much. I don't even know about my eye pressures yet, though they do feel on the firm side -- right now I'm just talking about the choppy sleep and the crankiness. I anticipated it, and was careful to exercise every day, but I have still needed pharmaceutical help to sleep, every night...... and have never gotten more than a couple of uninterrupted hours at a time (& more often 1-1.5.)
Even so I skipped the last dose, yesterday afternoon. The doc said that the post chemo steroids were about avoiding fluid retention, and that the most dangerous place would be in the lungs -- and that he thought i'd be at a lower risk of it because of all the exercise. We did talk about dropping the last day or cutting the dose next time, if I did fine this time. I will bring that up before my next chemo.......
I'm also wondering whether maybe I should switch chemo days; Thursday is a good day if I'm going to be tired, because I can rest on the weekend -- but if I'm not going to be able to sleep, maybe I want to do it on Tuesdays instead, since I have to get up at 6-6:30 on weekdays.
Course I already made a friend I expect to see next time -- but I'd make others. I did get her email address, so I could tell her what happened.
I'm also feeling bothered by the cold. This is nothing new, though.... just winter, arriving early.
Even so I skipped the last dose, yesterday afternoon. The doc said that the post chemo steroids were about avoiding fluid retention, and that the most dangerous place would be in the lungs -- and that he thought i'd be at a lower risk of it because of all the exercise. We did talk about dropping the last day or cutting the dose next time, if I did fine this time. I will bring that up before my next chemo.......
I'm also wondering whether maybe I should switch chemo days; Thursday is a good day if I'm going to be tired, because I can rest on the weekend -- but if I'm not going to be able to sleep, maybe I want to do it on Tuesdays instead, since I have to get up at 6-6:30 on weekdays.
Course I already made a friend I expect to see next time -- but I'd make others. I did get her email address, so I could tell her what happened.
I'm also feeling bothered by the cold. This is nothing new, though.... just winter, arriving early.
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